when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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What has wings and windows? A bluebird, I was nodding about the windows!

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

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Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

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Why am I righting in english? Because this is an english site.

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so a huge calculator walks into a bar, and a man steps out from behind it, and wipes his forehead.

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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whats is big, black, and has big boobs. a big black guy. the boob part was a little white lie

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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YEAH! LIKE RELLEZ! XD Anyway, sure, it depends, you don't get voted as the most pointless man on Horse-head network without working some for it, but if really weird comments impress you, then sure. Honestly though, I might have been flexing my show off muscles a bit more than usual, as in posting more stupid stuff than usual, BUT, that is because when a MAN meets a sexy WOMAN, yet another one than his WIFE, his already boiling testosterone burns with flames... ...And yeah, where where we again? Oh yeah, you acting a bit bimbo, and me going "RELLEZ" just to make you aware... Then added this.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

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I remember in the 80's it felt like Bill Cosby was being shoved down my throat. He was always on TV with his show and those Jello commercials.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Why didn't the blond resolved the Cold War? Once the blond's socio-economic background was really poor, she didn't have enough education to solve such geopolitical conflict, envolving imperialism, international influence, militar power and scientifical power, still without armed conflicts, as the respective leaders of both United States of America and United Soviet Socialist Republics knew a armed conflict would cost too much lifes, and even in a totally utilitarian society, the benefits of the war to both countries wouldn't be enough to justify the death of thousands. Therefore, its concluded that a meedle class person wouldn't be enough capable to be the charged to solve this kind of tenssion between States, and it would be really silly if someone happened to encharge the blond in issue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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