What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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hi

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

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What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

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How does Ron Weasley greet Harry in the morning? Mornin' Horry, how did ghe' sleep?

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Q: what is white and can't climb trees? A: A refrigerator

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops