What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

Why did the Chicken commit suicide Because he Ms. Reed

Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

5 people are walking

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

Bee1:Boo Bee2:Boo Look i found 2 boobies:)

Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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