why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

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Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

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Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you BUT The roses are wilting The violets are dead The sugar bowl's empty And so is your head

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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Do you need any assistance?

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

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Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

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Fart

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charlie sheen

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Knock, knock. Door opened.

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Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

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Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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Three women are sent to heaven. Theres a blond , brunette , and a redhead. There are 100 steps to heaven and on every step god tells you a joke and you cant laugh. The redhead makes it to step 23 then laughs. The brunette makes it to step 67 then laughs. Finally the blond make it all the way to the 100th step and before god can tell the joke she laughs. God asks why are u laughing? And the blond says " i just got the 1st one"!

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Going to bed? Mind if I Slytherin?

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

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A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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