What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

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What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

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whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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how many people with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes

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Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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What's more funny than an anti-joke? A joke.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

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Jersey Shore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He crossed the road to get to a podium. He then made a lond speech about how chickens should be able to cross a road with out having their motives questioned.

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JAMIE STEGMAN IS A MASSSIVE DERP Jess Pots. YOUR A NOOB

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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