what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the girl sad? Because borat came had DA SEXI TIME with yo mother in law:)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's bad about 4 asians getting shot? A: There could've been five

thumb_up thumb_down

Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Fags are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is white black and Chinese A panda

thumb_up thumb_down

Will gropes Ebola victims

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why are fish bad at basketball? Because they're afraid of the net...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops