How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

whats brown and smells like shit shit

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

Wanna hear a joke? No.

Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's ... Roses are Red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's (continues)

Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

Q: What did Batman say to Robin right before they got in the b\Batmobile? A: "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

Q~ What did the black man say to the priate when he pulled out a AK47? A~ "This is a gun. im going to kill you with it."

A man spills his his drink. Like any other man would do, he got some paper towels and some mult-purpose cleaner and proceeded to wipe up the mess. Not a further word was said about the situation.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

a blonde walks into a drycleaning store to get her clothes and on her way out the empoyee behind her says come again and then the blonde says shut up u nosy bitch its just toothpaste this time!!!

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

Q. Why did the 40 year old woman puts on a large amount of makeup? A. She may have gerontophobia.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...