jokes r dumb

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What do you call a dead black man? A corpse.

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Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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i have a christmas tree.

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What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

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You tie a noose around your neck, you jump off a cliff and before you hit the ground you shoot yourself in the head.

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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