Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

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Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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the economy.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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