A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

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What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

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knock knock who's there police

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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Mac: Hi, I'm a Mac! PC: And I'm a PC. Steve Jobs died.

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Ryan Chang is funny.

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Yo mamas so fat.

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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What's worse than a worm in your holocaust? An apple.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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Whats worse to see 100 dead babies on the bed of a truck or 100 fake babies falling directly from the empire state building... I don't know I have never seen either but if you could tell me if you saw it maybe i can use my imaination!!!

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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"...."-Hellen Keller

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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how did the tree fall on the woman? it didnt, trees dont grow in kitchens

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Do u liek mudkipz GO TROLLING

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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