What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

What do you get when you cross batman and superman? One egotesticul idiot SOB aka mofo ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

Woman's Rights

Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

what does mandy enjoy on weekends a load of cum in her face

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

Roses are red Viloets are unicorns this? doesn't make sense Refridgeator

A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

What did the dog say to the house? Roof

Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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