mark lawson likes boys

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

thumb_up thumb_down -33

a black is sexuel but a white nothin without a car.i mean im nothin i dont have a car i mean realy where do you get a car?its awesome but stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What did the Black man say to the kool ade Man? A: You're not real -BonkersLive

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

tobi packs fudge+parkers gay-sami

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops