hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

thumb_up thumb_down +2

rocky is staring at us from outside...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops