What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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How many blonde's does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to hold the ladder and one to peel the carrotts

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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Why did the fridge break? Because someone threw a fridge at it.

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What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

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What does water smell like? water.

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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peter charastabopouloulous

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Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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Hitler, Goebbels and Göring walked into a bar. They ordered 3 steins and took their seats in quiet corner of the establishment. After short deliberation they were ready to start work on building a highway that would be the envy of the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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