How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

Roses are red Violets are orange Thats odd, my violets are somehow orange

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

Why does Timmy Teblow love penis? Logan Cole made him do it.

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969 i like potatos 696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

This is an anti- joke

Women's Rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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