What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

What is yellow and fluffy? Green fluff, I lied about the yellow part.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

Why did the elephant paint its toenails red? So it could hide in a cherry tree. Have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? No.... See, it works!

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

Why couldn't Billy drive? He had no arms. Why did he have no arms? Thalidomide.

A Jew and a Nazi encountered each other on the street. They exchanged pleasant greetings and carried on in their desired directions.

Q:How many babies does it take to paint a room? A:It depends how hard you throw them

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

Neither have I, nobody knew him.

Why was the redneck so racist? Because he had a severe dislike for the black community.

A Pakistani news reader.

Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Knock Knock Who's There 42

you know what they say... hydrate or die

Charlie morgans a pussy EDEN HAZARDS A TANK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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