A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

thumb_up thumb_down +8

bum sex lol

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +6

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR S H I T STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

thumb_up thumb_down -22

your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

hello what is this crazy nonsense site sl

thumb_up thumb_down +3

My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's 2+2? Gonorrhoea

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops