What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

U mad?

why did the blind man crash his car? he had down syndrome.

A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he was to busy watching porn. And then was hit by a truck.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Billy Cundiff.

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

its snowing on mount fuji

Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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