What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

What goes up a smokestack instead of down? Murdered Jews, when they get cremated.

Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

why did the chicken cross the road, but didnt make it he didnt cross it. he was pushed by a band of gang members and hit by a bus

What did one gorilla say to the other? Urgh.

why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

What should someone do if they are Le Zirk? Have a zirk. THEN FIRE THE ZIRKKK!!!!!!!

women's lacrosse.

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

Pikachu walked into a bar. "GO, SQUIRTLE!" the bartender screamed. An epic Pokémon battle ensued, after they got drunk. The end. Pika pi!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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