roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

whats red bubbly and looks out of a windo? a baby in a mocrowave

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

Wigan.

John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

women's rights.

Knock knock! Who's there? Sheryl Sheryl who? No seriously, it's me, Sheryl.

What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

Life is like a box of chocolates, quite strange to enjoy when you're single.

Nickelback.

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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