Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Three women are seen walking while having ice cream. One of them is licking the ice cream. Another is sucking the ice cream, and the other one is biting the ice cream. One of these women is married. Which one is married? The one that has a wedding ring on her finger.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Pope: how to help the unfortunate people my fellow Christians? Christians: We should give donations and a lot of support. What we always do. Pope: and i shall wear this golden hat, sit on a high quality super expensive chair, this rope with gold attached to the decorations, and wave my golden staff as you help these poor innocent children. Christians: yes...that... Pope: P.S: and live in an expensive church with many children alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

thumb_up thumb_down

Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is white and sticky a stick from a birch tree

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happened when the turkey jumped out of the airplane? It fell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

thumb_up thumb_down +49

If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops