On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

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A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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why did i fall? i got pushed!

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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Why did the burrito taste bad? It's a giraffe.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

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Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Why wasent Toby at school He was hit by a tree

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

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Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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