Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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A lumberjack wearing women's underwear under his clothes walks into a bar. Several Canadian Mounties stand up and surround him, compliment him on his cooking and offer to go looking for some wild flowers for his herb collection.

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s s is for shit h h is for hit i i is for it t t is turtle

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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What do Michael Jordan and LeBron James have in common? They both have won NBA championships...except for Lebron.

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purple pickles

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

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My mom

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Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

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How do you approach a hot guy in the library? Very quietly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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