baby seal walks into a club

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

You know what's funny about table salt? Not much.

What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

No your aunties a joke

I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

there are rumors about monkeys liking bananas but that is a common misconception because if you take bananas divided by elephant times chalkboards you find that they like 0.9 lead from pencils that is aged from 1927

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

boys

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

What's megan fox's bra size? Wait I got a fb notification brb!

a man said hi.

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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