What's big and messy? A big mess

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

Q:Why did the boy drop his icecream? A: His arm was chopped off by a ninja

A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

Do you want to hear a bad joke? A bad joke

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

FIRE!!

Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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