Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato

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Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

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a guys was walking down the street in Queens. a attractive young woman walked by. He was interested in here so he said nice things and they ended up going on a date. She had a big butt.

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? The black guy is a sentient human being, and the bucket of shit is just a metal container filled with feces

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but I'm late for work.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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A man walks into a bar. Cool story, bro.

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yeyeyeyeye live action

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops