Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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A train poops its pants.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

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68

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

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yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

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Why did the man take a shower?, he didint smell so good...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops