Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

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there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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What is worse than standing on a plug? finding out your family have all been killen in a horrible car crash and your neighbours daughter who happens to be your friend has cancer.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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you know why people who read anti-jokes are stupid? i just had the greatest sex ever!!

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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she wasn't 18

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

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How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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