What are kids supposed to do in American classrooms if a nuke hits nearby? Hide under the desk. (This is a fact) Moral: Like that is gonna help... seriously that is ridiculous!

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME

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Q: how many people with adhd does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: wanna go ride bikes?

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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whats long and black? a baton

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How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

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How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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What swims in the ocean? Fish

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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Women's Rights

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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