Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

thumb_up thumb_down -136

What does a tree do all day? Boredom

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

thumb_up thumb_down +1,772

Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops