What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Helen Keller say when she fell off a cliff? That never happened. I just checked Wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the man with cancer do? Die

thumb_up thumb_down -7

1+1= 69

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man with a hammer in his head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -17

It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get a black man to use a condom? You explain to him all the benefits of safe sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops