what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

http://www.youtube.com/user/SWkangaroo

What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

If a tree falls in the forest, and only a deal man is there at the time, does it make a sound? And what are his odds of not being trapped under it, awaiting rescue?

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

I used to take arrows to the knee but then I didn't, for no particular reason.

What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

wots brown and smells like shite shite

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Charcoal is black, So is my neighbor.

His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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