A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

Click thumb up i will be eternally grateful

Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

What did the duck say to the pickle? Quack

What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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