How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie pop? It very depending on the amount of saliva produced in ones mouth..

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What is white and smells like wood? White painted wood

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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A Muslim blows up a bar

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Why did a black person get gingivitis? He repeatedly didn't brush which caused both dental plaque and tartar getting filled with harmful bacteria, and if they aren't removed from teeth, they will begin to irritate the gums and cause gingivitis.

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hi

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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I'm taken

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69

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what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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