What flys? A fly

how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

Q: What's worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Miami Heat.

A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

Your Mom is so fat... Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's Roses are Red

What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

you know you are a prostatute when your report car is full of Ds

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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