why couldn't the man open the window? he had no hands due to his time serving the USA in vietnam

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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What is the difference between a black man and a white man? Different skin color.

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There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

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Why did the blond put a condom on her hear? So, she would not get hearing ads.

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Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

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Q. Whats worse than 9 babies in 1 suitcase? A. 1 baby in 9 suitcases.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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Badgers are cool

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

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Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

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MLG 420 NO SCOPE THE JEWS

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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