Why was the baby crying? Because it was just born and usually a baby cries when its born, if it dosent it usually means something is wrong, so the mother was happy to hear her baby cry.

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How old are you? 7

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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A giant storm loomed over a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who has been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

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What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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A pope meets another one

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A gay dyslexic black man walks in to a bar the bar tender say "what'll it be" and then he orders his drink and pays his bill and leaves.

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What makes a subaru a subaru? The fag thats driving it

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Why was the girl sad? Because she was, you idiot!

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

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Honk if you're Amish!

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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