Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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your moms so fat when she sat on your ipod it turned into an ipad

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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69

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How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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