Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +188

Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What goes in long and hard and comes out soft and sticky? Chewing Gum

thumb_up thumb_down +91

roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops