Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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Gabe Mercado

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

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Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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anti jokes are really funny

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER FORGET.

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A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

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What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

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Q- what do you call a Jew swimming in the Antarctic? A- Dead, any man wouldn't survive swimming in water that cold

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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