Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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The Irishman walked out of the bad.. Haha just kidding

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

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Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What is woman spelled backwards? namow.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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terry stockton is straight

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops