In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman crashed onto a desert island... The Englishman swiftly used his satellite phone to broadcast their location and they were taken home to their worried families.

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

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Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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KILL WHITEY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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