what do you call a black man with a job? dont know, has never happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you get when you cross a child and jt Rape

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the tree catch on fire? A phinix hit it!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Jesus Christ walks into a Hotel.. he hands the Inn keeper 3 nails and says " Hey..can you put me UP for the night?"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

guy walks into a bar, ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops