Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

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Q: What has two wheels and is not funny? A:Ryan Vallee on a segway -Ryan V

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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A tiger walks into a bar, the patrons ran out terrified.

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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Roses are red, violet are blue I have AIDS

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Dinosaur!

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why did suzy get hit by the bus because she got dumped into the road and she had no legs

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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What did the skateboarder do when he was trying to do an ollie kickflip 360 and tailslide on a rail and dismount heelflip to manual? He fell

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

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A man finds an old lamp, rubs it, and releases the genie trapped inside. The genie grants him three wishes. So the man wishes for a million more wishes and uses them all wisely,

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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