What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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YOLO

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

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why did my girlfriend get pregnet? i didn's use a condom, and my semen entered her long muscular tube, also known as a vagina.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

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What did the kid with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? A: Polio.

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

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Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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