What do men and women have in common? no really what do they have in common

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

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Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

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Q:How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: Well, we can solve this problem of the wood chuck chucking our wood by putting all of your spare wood in a wood chipper. Try throwing dust you chucking bastard.

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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knock knock whose there the hospital staff your mom just died of AIDS

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

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What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

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Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

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What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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How much cocaine has Charlie Sheen done? enough to put your health at risk

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What do a jew and a black have in common? God hates both of them

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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It smells like triangles in here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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