Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

what purple and jolly barney who doesnt love his charactorial warmth!# not weird

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Caolan and Eamon

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

the game

What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

What did the kid say when his parents were killed? Nothing. He's a vegetable

jesus can walk on water but chuck norris can swim through land

how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

you

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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