Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John. John Anderson. Dude we've been friends since first grade! You really don't remember me? I'm going home!

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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What do black men do in the South? Hang around

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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SAY

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Why the boy doesn't get any birthday presents? he has cancer.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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