More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to your house Knock knock: whos there? The chicken duh

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

The person below me is weird.

- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

Q: what's blue and kills you when it falls from the sky? A: a whale no shit

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

why was osama bin laden shot and killed? because he was a very violent man and deserved his punishment

what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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