A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

What's heavy, black, and when hanging by a rope from a tree, makes white people happy? A tire, in any white football player's backyard.

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

Where's my tractor?

i named my son Frodo because he was little

Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

what do round tank toilets do? blow up CC

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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