What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -20

whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

thumb_up thumb_down

what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

D/M/Y ~~ Take 21/12/2012 Flip it upside down Take the 2's out from both ends (1/12/201) Take out all the ones and two's (//0) Take your zero and turn it 90 degrees to the right Take out the forward slashes What you are left with, a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the blonde girl fall down? She didnt see where she was goin

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

thumb_up thumb_down +77

My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats green and tasty? Snot

thumb_up thumb_down -65

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the fat guy say after his weight-reduction surgery? I'm gonna sue the clown pants out of McDonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

thumb_up thumb_down -148

Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops