what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Roses are red violets are blue why dont u go take a shower

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How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

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What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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Camerons hair is Curly..

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"Wow, that was so funny i fell off my dinosaur!" Dinosaurs went extinct in the late Cretaceous period, about 65 million years ago. Commonly believed by scientists across the world to have been caused by an ancient meteor that crashed in the current day Yucatán peninsula in Mexico. Also, even if you were around during the Cretaceous period, i assure you that no dinosaur would let you climb on top of it, let alone ride it while you're not highly terrified because of the sheer danger of the experience. Now unless you are 65 million years old, I highly doubt you laughed so hard that you fell off the dinosaur that you supposedly own.

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whats worse than getting in a car crash Heroshema

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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At home, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 10 mins, it's 3:30. At school, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 20 mins, it's 3:40 and schools been finished for ten minutes.

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What is a jew in space? Dead

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

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why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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Why did the book fly to Cambodia? It was on a plane that was delivering educational material to third world countries to enhance their schools and increase their literacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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